Ready to Leap?Dec 23, 2018
They say “take the leap and the net will appear”- this has been proven many times in my life.
I can’t help to think practical thought, logistical planning, and accurate steps would add an insurance policy against failure…then I ask, would I ever leap?
I believe its in how we navigate, a balance if you will, a balance that we do not get caught up in the minutia of fears and fabricated stories that prevent us from launching, and buffering what we can looking forward…knowing what we know, which we have to come to terms with the fact that in the overall schemes of things, we know very little, and that’s OK!
There’s something about the spontaneity, the “ahh fu#% it” moment, the throw it all to the wind that begins the ripples of manifestation…even though we cannot see how it will play out…the story gets written.
As a child, I stood at the end of the high dive…the goal was to jump, the challenge was the mind.
Every extra second I stood and pondered- the further away I was to make the jump.
I knew I couldn’t turn back, my friends below watching, hell, the whole swim club looking up at this little kid just standing there, the other kids waiting in line to ascend the latter to make their own jump…
I knew “not doing it” was not an option…so then I stopped thinking…and I did…
Those milli seconds on the way down felt like an eternity, as motion slowed, I could see the blur of my surroundings, the green grass hills, pool chairs full of people, the snack bar in the distance…
And suddenly…splash! It was over…it was a thrill which I wanted to do again, nothing bad, no regrets, I opened the door to a small, yet real possibility for next steps.
And then in my adult years…my early 30’s, I stood at the skate park in Jackson Hole, the concrete bowl, on my skateboard, perched with my tail on the lip, ready to drop in…and every second I pondered, the further away I was from dropping in…
I knew I had to do it…and what was holding me back? My thoughts, my mind, the creation of stories, irrational worries, and fears…
And suddenly…whoosh…I dropped in, it was like I was nudged by an angel, and angel who had my back and knew what I needed to do.
My board wiggled back and forth, I gained my balance as I built greater speed to the other wall…I was on the down hill run faster and faster, quickly deciding what to do as the other wall approached fast…do I bail, do I attempt a turn, a carve into the wall, to bring me back like a pendulum gaining momentum?
I turned, I carved…I made it…the speed was exhilarating, the unknown transitioned from the fear to the glory…as I squeezed every little carve out of that run, back and forth until the momentum died, and left me standing on my board, in the bottom of the bowl looking out…I picked up my board, got a running start and climbed on back out…to do it again…and again, and again until my thighs and my quads were burning, my legs where shaking, my spirit was vibe-ing!
As I continue to look back on my life, other examples such as opening an integrative pharmacy, off the beaten path, in the high rent district of a conservative Midwest town…one thing remains clear…
To get from where I was…stuck, stationary, polarized, oppressed by fear and worry, creativity numbed- there was only one way to get to where I wanted to go, and that was to jump, to drop in, to take the leap, the risk to get to the other side- there was no other way
…and each and every time, no matter how big or how small, I could not have predicted each outcome, and the butterfly affect that took hold- each and every time, my life became better, sure my shins were skinned along the way, although I became stronger, more empowered, creativity opened up, my story was further written to be who I am meant to be, who I am, as I am continually uncovering.